In the space of five minutes one morning earlier this week I tripped over Ada’s walker, stubbed my toe on the kitchen door and fell onto of a huge pop-up tent that has been erected in our living room. Being a parent can be dangerous sometimes especially when your kids like to leave makeshift bobby traps out for you on a daily basis.
It got me thinking about child-related injuries that I’ve sustained over the past couple of years.
Car Seat Wrist.
Carrying your baby in their car seat is all fun and games at first until they start putting on weight and suddenly you’re carrying a car seat and a one and a half stone baby. True story – I actually did have an actual medical condition caused by carrying Harley around in his car seat when he was a baby. My wrist basically became a little deformed and I had to have physio and wear a wrist brace for a while.
Ok so I’ve given birth twice and I’m going to level with you, standing on LEGO bloody well hurts bad. I’m sure most parents have experienced the pain. I’d say there are different pain scales dependent on exactly what part of the LEGO and foot make contact – a toe is painful but oh my, if it hits the arch of your foot it’s game over. Mum down.
An actual black eye.
Last year I got my first ever black eye. Harley gave it to me. I can’t even remember how but obviously he didn’t mean to do it. I did, however, end up with one hell of a shiner that took weeks to shift properly. I was about 32 weeks pregnant with a black eye that couldn’t be covered by make-up, great look.
The ‘Oh my God what has she put in her mouth?’ heartstopper.
This is a new one I’ve started experiencing with Ada. When Harley was Ada’s age he was happy to stay put in one position surrounded by toys, Ada has other ideas. She is the most inquisitive little explorer with incredible eyesight. She can scan the room and within seconds she’ll be right next to the smallest object or speck of dust she can find trying to ram it into her mouth. Nappy rash cream (yellow Metanium EVERYWHERE), LEGO, stickers. This week she even ate Harley’s homework from preschool. Nightmare. Not only do I end up having several mini heart attacks a day (slight exaggeration) but I usually end up standing on some kind of toy in my haste to fish whatever it is out of her mouth (see also LEGO Foot).
The Stairs Booby Trap.
I love my son, he’s pretty amazing. But he is incredibly untidy and has a lovely habit of leaving trials wherever he goes, usually on the stairs. His favourite things to leave on there seem to be cars, step on one of those bad boys and you’re going to end up at the bottom in a heap. Thanks Harls!
So there’s my list, I’m sure there are lots more to add but I’ve forgotten them, probably all those bangs to the head on the car boot whilst getting the pushchair in and out. Would love to hear if anybody else has become ridiculously clumsy since becoming a parent, let me know in the comments.
The Aspiring Yummy Mummy. x